H I S A S H I B U R I

it's been a while since i blogged.
my laziness. haha. =P

recently, life's been, well, not that bad, but not exactly good either.
but then, there's fun in life, afterall.
but i slacked wayyyyy too much, needa buck up liao sia~~~
if not, i can forget about passing everything.
yeah. it's that bad. =X

February's coming,
and F is for February, as well as Farewell.
we're gonna celebrate Jue's birthday! although celebrate late.
and on the same day we're gonna have a farewell with mean senior SngZhanHui.
poor gim moh gonna shave his head and go to NS liao.
take care in tekong. dun kena weird stuff. come back in 1 piece. HAHA!
and then, come mid-feb, Teddy Bear Arens Sir is going off to Australia to study.
heard he going for 2 years or sth?
take care over there, dun get whacked by kangaroos~ haha xD
and maybe come back with a sweet australian lady! hahaha! =P

on a happier note,
February=CNY, and i'm going Genting with family~
it's the first time since dan dan was born that we have a trip together as a whole family!
yay for that! xD
i am so gonna go buy loads of stuff,
and play loads of stuff~~
kekeke..
and i look forward to talking crap with Jie in the hotel room for the whole night,
without our laptops as distraction. haha~ xD

and then and then,
February is also exams.
3 papers this time, after the 3 papers, whoo hoo~ holidays!
march there'd be class chalet!(daddy allows me to go stay overnight! xD),
and there's ATC(which i really hope can have)
and there's free time also! =)
i want free time~~~~~
and i'll be year 2 in April. so fast sia... hahaha..

hmmm, something interesting,
yesterday night, told 2 people a story of myself.
back in 2007. haha.
that made me think about you.
i wondered why we stopped talking back then.
but thinking back, walao, i damn idiotic sia. hahaha~
and then, i wonder if we would ever work together again,
and if we did, would we be able to talk properly?
like as co-workers or sth?
and then again, on bus trips alone, or when getting something on my own,
sometimes when i pass by places we went to before,
then i would think about stuff back then.
eh, i would say that maybe because my social circle isn't very big,
or maybe because i am anti-social,
so i tried quite some stuff for the first time when we were still on talking terms,
and it was fun, definitely.
would just like to say thanks for the fun.
=)
and i just remembered,
February is your birthday too.

well, that's all for the long time no see post.
will post more regularly,
but let me buck up on my studies first.
JA~

Training



i guess there'd be many many complaints flying around by now,
from the NCOs and the cadets..
last time,
when i was still a NCO,
before i scold, i'd hesitate,
and ended up nagging, which is the worse kind of thing to do.
while bathing just now, i thought to myself,
i wondered whether i did the right thing by saying all that,
i wondered whether i did the right thing by scolding you all,
i wondered whether i did the right thing by punishing you all,
i wondered whether i did the right thing by expecting solid bangs, no mistake, endurance, being able to show the same standard from start to end..
then i asked myself, "what kind of future do i want for GESS SJAB?",
and then all the things i wondered, the answer became "yes"

to be frank, i am not someone who likes scolding people..
or even punishing..
because it's a physically tiring thing,
and it's not a pleasant thing to do..
i am a 和平主义者
so it's not something i like to do..

i shall be firm and strict,
not mean and ferocious..
but then again, whatever you think of me,
i have no control over that..
and i don't mind if you can dislike what i do,
as long as you do your best..
and as long as you realise at the end of it..

how many will read this, i dunno..
but if you ever do,
answer this question:
"what kind of future do you want for GESS SJAB?"

Johnny's Countdown 2009-2010


I finally managed to watch the countdown properly,
and subbed, all thanks to newshfan! =DDDD
and there are a few things i find interesting in this year's countdown..
-V6's backflip
they were totally synchronised with one another, despite their age =X... i think that it's kinda really impressive.. bravos to oyajis~ =P
-Ueda's hair
totally became one that resembles a cute little puppy!!! xD so uper cute~~~ hee hee~~~
dun worry hime, i won't steal da-oji from you~~~ haha~ =P
-Tomapi moment!
they are just so damn uper duper super cute together!!!!! xDDDDDD
except for Pi's bad hair AGAIN. D:
-MatsuJIN moment
you know, actually, their meaness to each other is scripted, like how ohno offends nakai on utaban. it's to make the show more interesting you know, you know you know? haha~ =P
MatsuJun is not that bad actually, he's kinda like nino, like mean, sadistic, venomous tongue, and simply because of all that badness, when they suddenly do something nice, you'd realise they aren't too bad ne~ xDDDD
-Kame in traditional costume
looks very sapuri/shuji poi~ but he looks so siannnn.. D:
-Massu is cute in traditional costume
this sentence is totally a fact. haha~ =P
-KANJANIEIGHT!
they really make the countdown sooooo fun!!! i tell you, i think i would wanna go to a kanjani 8 concert someday. it seems like it'd be loads of fun and laughter.
provided i can understand the jokes. =X but their actions itself is funny already! =)
-SHUJI TO AKIRA!!!!!!!!!
okay, i'm seriously a sucker for this. HAHA~
KAMEPI~~~
they helped host a lil before Arashi arrived with TOKIO. and they had about 5 seconds in the opening, and a short while together during the Seishun Amigo perf.
but, still, they are together~~ xDDDDDD
-Arashi singing KAN8's song, and vice versa~~!!!!
this segment is just god damn cute~~~~
xDDDDD
esp Ohno "hontouni suki desu!" at the end, with a serious face. HAHA~ damn cute 29 year old. =P and KAN8 tries to act out the PV of one love, flying doves, jumping around. hmmmms. HAHA~
but it's nice to see that during one love, while KAN8 is doing the singing, the mini box shows Arashi doing the dance moves together at the same time... so cute! xD
-Daisempai segment
it's SUPER nice to see all the Johnny's backdancing for kondo masahiro, in the usual song he sings every year at countdown. and they dance it in sync. Bravos to KATTUN for that! =P
jkjk
-ARASHI
they go around poking at each other, making fun of sempais and kouhais, and ohmiya! juntoshi! ninoXaiba! they are just so damn uper cute~~~ xDDDD
-Ryo singing along with NEWS.
whenever NEWS sings, they'd switch the airing to Ryo for a short while as well, and it's cute to see Ryo singing along with NEWS in a separate location~~~ and KAN8 fooling around by being petals to Ryo da flower.and i mean they literally had some kinda formation like that. HAHAHA!


countdowns are really fun~~~
love them..
next year, hopefully,
as what hime says,
we can go camp at her house for the countdown!!!
that would be soooo fun! xDDDD
okay, gotta go,
JA~

there's so much i wanted to type here,
there's so much happening..
no doubt, i should be glad that i'm living my current life,
but to have 2010 start like that,
for the most important part of my life,
it seems a little, sad.
yeah, i am self-pitying right now, and that sucks,
but i have a sudden urge to rush down to HQ to talk to Jie about everything..
the thing i hate the most in this world,
is cold war, ignoring, and all that shit..

2010


first off,
first day of the year,
Happy New Year!
Akemashite Omedetou~~!
=)

well,
it's like 6.30am at the moment and i'm awake already..
not cox i wanted to of course,
just that thirst has woke me up,
and left me awake since around 5.30am..
haha~~~

hmmm, yesterday's attempts at watching Johnny's countdown was kinda failed..
did watch about 5 seconds of song,
then they went to the group by group interview,
then it went safaafoesnflanlkgqrnglkrhglmglj,
lagging, obviously..
haha~~~
but thanks to kind souls who bother to record and upload,
i'll get to watch the whole thing on youtube later~~
yay~! xDDD

and well,
in real life,
my day today didn't start too well..
i know you're unhappy about daddy etc and all,
but it's not only today that you ignore me...
i ever once overheard you talking to ah yi
about how you feel guilty sometimes to be ignoring us,
like you are treating us the same way as ______ treats you..
but, i guess, the guilt went away so quickly..
i wonder what's wrong..
am i not your child or what?
i may not be the best kid around,
i may not be an angel that stays outta trouble,
i may not be a kid that you can be proud of,
i may not be a kid who listens to you always,
i may not be a child that is perfect,
i always makes mistakes,
i am lazy
i dun work hard enough at my studies,
i go back for SJ, which you dun understand,
i dun make you understand me,
i dun talk to you about my troubles,
i dun tell you when i'm sick
etc etc etc,
i do stuff that would make you, as a parent, worry,
as a mother, heartache,
as my mummy, i know it's not easy for you,
but i don't think i never tried...
actually i tried to make you happy,
but i wonder what exactly makes you happy?
i don't think i know what to do to make you happy,
maybe the mere exsistence of me makes you irritated?
sometimes i really wonder,
have you ever regretted giving birth to me?
but no matter what,
i choose to believe that you love me,
just that you dun show out,
like how Jie loves me but doesn't show out..
you just dun ask me about stuff as often as daddy does..
no doubt he nags and scold, but i think it shows his concerns
i choose to believe that,
because Jie ever told me that,
family, kinship is something that will never change,
kinship is the only thing that fits into
百年先も愛を誓うよ
it's the only type of love that wouldn't change, forever..
i dun blame you,
i haven't been a good kid,
so it's okay if you love me less..
i just hope,
things in this very family won't turn out to be consistent cold war,
like we keep ignoring each other,
not saying more than 10 sentences each day,
i dun think that's how family actually works..
nevertheless,
you won't get to see this post..
so this becomes my rants..
hahaha,
i'm so stupid..

anyways,
people,
enjoy today loads alright?
and school is starting soon~~
mixed feelings..
assignments, yet to complete =X
but when school starts,
can see Buin and Phoebe,
and then, there's a more time-tabled lifestyle,
haha~~
wells,
that's all,
i shall go make clues for log camp!!!
JA~