random ramblings

Been busy busy busy the past week. will be busy busy busy in the coming weeks too.
To be honest, i feel guilty towards my family alr.
but then again, i cannot dun do what i am supposed to do also, right?


wells wells.
been kinda sick. i suppose it originated from my sinus or sth.
hates the feeling of having my ears blocked. sians.
and now comes the semi-stuck phlegm.
i begin to wonder am i starting to feel the strain from everything or what? haha.


sian. i missed the Army Open House, totally,
wanted to go over after ANCO meeting yesterday, but ended up eating dinner with Arens, Unnie and Hui Ying, and going to drink beer somewhere near HQ(thanks Arens! hahahas~)
Sorry Twinnie! ps you in the end. Wells um, i supposed you had training in being a gooseberry.
hehehes~


went to Ksuite with cousins(thanks Daniel! LOLs) and had fun singing.
then heard this song that they chose to sing.
the lyrics made me think about a not-so-pleasant someone.
LOLs okay, i thought about, maybe the lyrics might have been how 3ya felt at that time.
But oh wells, not that i mind alot la huh, over alr.
Not like i yearn for things to work out.
In fact, in retrospective, our r/s really couldn't have worked out properly.
I dunno why, but i am kinda sure that it wouldn't, even if what happened didn't happened.
Anyhow, it's this nice song:


王力宏「你不知道的事」









the busy me is also a sensitive mess.
but then again, i think maybe i am, like what derrick says, a weirdo. haha~
but aiya, it's okay, as long as i remember that i am not the only tired one and not the most tired one, i can carry on.
Even if i am, i would and should think that i am not.
It's not being delusional. It is just putting yourself smaller.
like what weewee says, when people are out in the cold, suffering from famine and having issues with surviving till the next day,
you know you shouldn't be exclaiming out loud how you are suffering from all your first world shitty problems.
At least you are in a welfare enough environment to actually have those first world shitty problems.
That's why we shouldn't be whining.
Actually i think we should reflect and repent and do our best such that we do not waste the privilege that we enjoy.


oh, and i really really have to do up my appeal soon.
or rather, NOW. 
if not i would never stand a chance (not like doing it earlier gives me chances, but at least i show that i am gan cheong)
wells, even if i end up failing again, i will try to get into diploma and then go to degree from there.
longer route la, abit impractical and waste time.
But at least i am moving towards where i wanna be, where i wanna go.
So yeahhhh at least i know i wouldn't let go of what i wanna do anymore. (:


Actually, if you asked me what i wanna be this life,
i think the most important thing i wanna be in this life would be someone who brings optimism to people around me.
yes la, i am some emo shit and kinda really self-centred and selfish and can't make up my fickle-minded self kinda person.
And i'm also not kind enough to sign up for those overseas program to go to third world countries to help them rebuild. (actually maybe i would, idk, but i have issues with dirty toilets. yes i am such a whiner and irritatingly selfish shit)
But at the very least, i wanna make people feel positive. like empowering them with sunshine.
It sounds stupid, and maybe it is,
but i feel happy when i can be someone who my friends and family turn to.
Or when my juniors feel enthusiasm and optimism from me.
It's as though i help them turned on the lights.
It's a warm fuzzy nice feeling that i really like. hehes~
But that is not much of an aspiration. hurhur.


Aiya nvm, by age 35, if i'm not married, i will save enough money to open a nursery/student care
Twinnie, sponsorship please. Thank You!!! :D
Then all of my friends will send their kiddos over!!!
hmmms, that, or maybe if i am freaking poor, i shall be nanny to my friends' kiddos.
wheeeee... the cute babies and todds and kiddos.


Okay i am seriously going on a long loh soh random ramblings(but hey that's the title right?)


Looking forward to this week, with recce trip on Friday night(LOVE the walking!!!)
and FAC on sunday(yay! squadmates coming!!! xD)


right, enough of my lohsohness. haha~
JA~~ (: